I have the incredible fortune of having some of the top thought leaders from around the world grace my stage at my conferences. Last year Nancy Matthews, Denise Jacobs, Bob Burg, and Dr. John Demartini and many others shared their stories of inspiration at the 2nd Annual PBL Conference and Evolve.
Nancy made an impression on me several years ago when she shared about the “folk tale factories” that we all have in our heads. Things are not always as they seem and we as humans do a really good job of making up stories about things. Jumping to conclusions. Filling in the blanks with our own stories. Making assumptions. Sometimes our stories that exist in our “folk tale factories” are just that Folk Tales. On of my “Folk Tales” I shared about for the first time 2 years ago on father’s day.
One of those memories, I thought I had healed many years ago. I realized recently that I still harbored some issues around it when the situation came up during a recent transformation weekend that focused on MONEY. I have spent years transforming my life and I speak regularly on some of the situations I was left in as a child.
My memory of the situation from the eyes of a ten year old little girl was completely different than the actual situation as it had occurred, but it wasn’t until I actually told my father what had happened that I found out the truth and more healing was to come.
It took me 27 years to tell him that I was molested by the neighbor when he left my 4 year old sister and I alone in an apartment with no furniture or food. I decided to finally tell him a few weeks ago because I knew that this idea of lack “being without food and money” and being left to fend for myself at such a young age was holding me back. It is amazing how we can sabotage our own lives by the memories we have.
What I found out that day changed things forever in my mind and allowed for me to grow and open. He didn’t just completely leave me and my sister abandoned it that apartment. The couple next door had offered to feed us and watch over us. The same couple that the young father molested me. My father was very sad and sorry when I told him the situation that had happened.
I realized 2 things that day. My father was younger than I am now when he made that decision and he was only doing the best with what he knew at that time. He had his own demons and issues that would haunt HIM for years.
Sometimes our stories that exist in our “folk tale factories” are just that Folk Tales. I believed all these years my version of the story, not knowing or even considering that there was another truth to what happened.
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